Giving practical tips and encouragement to mommies of girls
A Game PlanMay 2013
A very wise Amy Carmichael suggested that we put our words through this test before we speak them.
- Is it true?
- Is it kind?
- Is it necessary?
- Great habit to develop for when you mess up. For every negative thing we say to our kids, it takes 10 positive statements to un-do the damage.
- Self-fulfilling prophecy. Don’t state things that you don’t want to come about: like she is lazy, or trouble, etc. But follow the example in the movie The Help: You are kind, you are smart, you are important (to me and to the Father).
- Catch your child being good and then state it. “Oh, I like your manners!” “Oh, you are so strong when you stand up for others.”
- Work on sibling talk. Apologizing for mean words is important, but sometimes those mean words lead to a life of resentment and broken relationships. If they are not allowed to say hateful things, it will minimize the number of wounds that can cause pain. That is the reason we didn’t say stupid, shut up, idiot, I hate you, etc. Reminding them that they and their siblings belong to the Heavenly Father is also an attitude they need to learn.
- Same rule for self-talk. We chose not to say (or think to ourselves) things that could lead to destruction of self–image and hope. I’m stupid, fat, I wish I’d never been born, etc.
- Make your word valuable and true. Don’t make idle threats or empty promises. Just make a statement. If you do promise a punishment or a reward, make yourself remember and follow through just like He does. Then, when you actually promise something important, your kids can bank on it. “God has a plan for your life.” “God will get you through this.”